Broken Hearted on Valentine’s Day

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Valentine’s Day often triggers sadness and pain about a loved one that died, a relationship that changed or ended, or a love they wish they had. That’s NORMAL. Feelings of grief are just as valid as emotions of love.

Sadly most of us weren’t taught how to recover from heartbreak, or how to walk through a difficult day or situation.  Below are some helpful things to help you through a tough day;

  • Don’t be strong. Be honest. Being strong for others really means avoiding your feelings and demonstrating to others by example that it’s not okay to be sad. If you need to talk about your feelings, cry, or to take a moment to hug a loved one extra hard, then do so.
  • Don’t try to replace your loss. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “There are other fish in the sea.” Well guess what? People are individual and unique. Since no two people are alike there is no way you could possibly replace another person. What you can do is get complete with the relationship that ended or changed, so that you will be fully available to the next person.
  • Don’t stay busy.  Busyness and distractions push back the inevitable feelings you have to feel. Many people try to avoid their feelings with alcohol or food. Pay attention to what activities you might be using to distract yourself near Valentine’s Day. I get it, it’s easy to try to avoid feelings with a box of chocolate or candy hearts, but remember, you can’t go around a broken heart.
  • Don’t try to fix yourself. You are not broken. There’s nothing wrong with feeling sad and heartbroken. It’s as normal as the sun rising in the morning.
  • Don’t isolate. Can you ask for help by making a plan to see, or talk to someone on Valentine’s Day? Find someone that won’t try to fix you.
  • Don’t avoid Valentine’s Day rituals if you don’t want to. If there are Valentine’s Day memories that you love, go ahead and do them. Call someone and share your day together. Get creative or plan something for a later date.

I hope that you were able to find some of these tips useful.

If you’re ready to take the steps to meaningful and lasting healing of that grief and heartbreak, the grief Recovery Method can restore hope and change your life. I look forward to hearing from you.