Mother’s Day Mixed Emotions

Mother’s Day is a reason to celebrate for many people, but it can bring up sad or painful feelings for others.

Death isn’t the only reason that people grieve.

Death isn’t the only reason you might be grieving around Mother’s Day.  Maybe your mom was abusive or less than loving.  Maybe she didn’t mother in the way you needed, or she did something that hurt you later in life.  Maybe you simply wish things in your relationship were different, better, or more in some way.  Have you ever thought “What would life be like if I wasn’t carrying these feelings around with me?”

Unresolved grief can have a long term negative impact on your life. Grief is cumulative and cumulatively negative. The more you try to ignore your grief, or push it under the rug, the more it will affect your life. Grief not only affects current and future personal relationships, but it can also impact your work, health, and even things you used to enjoy doing. The intensity of your feelings may lessen over time, but grief doesn’t heal on its own.

The good news is that there’s a solution!

If you’re like most people, you simply never learned how to get complete and recover from a broken heart. There are a lot of things we’ve been taught to change our feelings in the short term, and plenty of articles telling you how to do that, but you must be willing to do the work if you truly want to recover from a loss.

That starts with being honest that you want something more for yourself; that you want freedom from pain, sadness, resentment, or whatever you are feeling. Try talking to someone you trust. Tell the truth about yourself. Ask them not to judge, criticize, or analyze (then don’t judge, criticize, or analyze yourself either).

Imagine what it would feel like not feeling pain, anger, or sadness every single time you think about your mom. Wouldn’t that be freeing? You don’t have to live that way.

Get started with The Grief Recovery Method.